i can't help but like i don't deserve any of these things that are happening to me. i'm not a good person, i don't have the ability to make anything of myself, i am entirely talentless and i don't think i can do this.

i want to go back to last year, where even though the majority of people i was friends with gave two shits about my well being, i was still friends with them and surrounded by people constantly and happy (ish)

i am sick to death of forcing my best friend to hang out with me when she's obviously got better things to do, cause i need to be around someone that is not my mother.

this is so pathetic i'm actually cringing at myself uhhhhhhhh

demons

i have a few demons

wrapped tightly in my insecurities

disguised by the use

of wit and false charm

cleverly embedded in

the three years of fighting them

i lay down

and play with my hands

and hair

to wish that my hands were your hands tonight

i am young

and i fear that life will have no value

without you in it

my only company will be my demons

coated in denial

they play tauntingly

with my hands and hair

to wish that their hands were your hands tonight

their hands are your hands tonight